Conflict at work

How to manage interpersonal conflict at work

In this series on workplace wellbeing, we’ll be talking about managing our personal wellbeing at work. This week, the focus will be on dealing with challenging interpersonal dynamics at work.

If you clicked on this article, chances are that you have at some point had to deal with conflict at work - the truth is that we all have. Interpersonal conflict at work can significantly impact on our wellbeing and on our productivity at work.

There are many reasons why we can struggle to get along with our colleagues and managers. We can experience open conflicts with colleagues, where we have differences of opinion. However, many conflicts are hidden conflicts that are not openly discussed. These conflicts can remain unresolved and cause increasing levels of distress.

So what are some common reasons for conflicts at work? We may simply find it difficult to be around someone with a contrasting personality or with habits that don’t suit us. Maybe you’re sharing an office with someone who is a lot more extroverted and talkative than you are. You would prefer to start your day in peace and quiet, while your colleague loves chatting to you about work and life. While these are not major issues, if cultural or personality differences make us feel stressed, it’s important to address them.

Poor communication can also negatively impact on how we relate to our colleagues at work. Intransparent communication from a manager about how our team will be restructured will likely leave us feeling highly anxious. Frequently having to follow-up with key stakeholders about important project questions might lead to frustration building up.

When we work across teams, we may encounter conflicts to do with competing demands of different teams or differences in work cultures. For example, an engineering team might have to jump on solving an urgent issue and cancel a call with the customer success team about a feature request from a prospective customer.

There are also more serious concerns we can encounter at work such as workplace bullying, abuse, discrimination, or favouritism. If you feel bullied, discriminated against, bullied, or unfairly treated, it’s important to speak to Human Resources.

There are unique challenges associated with different organisational structures, however irrespective of the size and structure of an organisation, if we are experiencing conflict with a more senior colleague or our line manager, there will be additional power dynamics to consider. Leadership approaches can vary significantly and can often contribute to a hidden conflict. A laissez-faire leadership style can leave employees with little support. On the other hand, with micromanagement the manager demands complete control, leaving employees feeling disempowered. Not getting the support or trust to move a project forward can cause dissatisfaction and impact on motivation levels of employees.

So how can we deal with conflict at work? Here are a few first steps:

First, try to take a step back to understand the problem.
Write down the main issues and try to “label” them.
How long have these problems been occurring?

Second, acknowledge how the conflict is impacting on you.
I feel…
I notice thoughts such as…
This is impacting on…

Third, try to work out what level of support is needed.
What will help make this situation better?
Who can I talk to?

There are different ways to deal with a conflict at work, including sharing your feelings with the other person, finding a way to work through or around the issue, or speaking to HR. You may also decide to have counselling to get support for some of the feelings and thoughts you are experiencing and take charge of the situation. Besides dealing with the conflict, it is important to have regular check-ins with yourself about your subjective wellbeing and to prioritise self-care. In our next blog, we’ll be discussing the topic of resilience which is highly relevant when dealing with stressors at work.

Here are three questions for you to consider:

💡 Are you experiencing a conflict at work?

💡 If yes, how are you dealing with this?

💡 How can you prioritise self-care at this time?


In this blog series, we will be looking at topics relating to workplace wellbeing. For personalised support, please get in touch. For more content on navigating change, please subscribe to my newsletter.